Why do Koreans celebrate Pepero Day? How do they celebrate it besides from giving away boxes of Peperos? I don’t know exactly how or why but we did anyway. I am adopting the K-culture cause I am KPop. Orz
I don’t really like any pink colored things especially clothes but I got run out of choice with this pink booties so I just pair it up with my black shredded shirt. This is one of the bunch of shirts I shredded with my cruel hands and it’s still counting.
Pink bag (St. Francis Square Mall)
Pink boots (SM Mall)
Black shirt (Divisoria)
High waist shorts (Mom’s old closet)
You still love him but she does too, she’ll take him far away from you…
—White Lies, You Still Love Him
But you still fell and though you are already standing tall and straight, you will always temp to look down to see what was left… what you left. The feeling that a part of you was there… your false feelings, a person that changed your life and even your heart. Sometimes life is really cruel. You never know when will it take you back to something you never want to look back, like where something painful exist. Then a moment will come where confusion will bother you, your heart will beat unconciously abnormal and that you will literally try to shake your head to change what’s on your mind.
Is it even possible? I mean to live forward and leave something behind? Something that has been a big part of your life? of what you have become now? I don’t know. Here goes the questions again. They’ve always been left unanswered and unspoken.
if you want it and you have the chance, grab it! you’ll never know what will happen unless you try it!
It has been a long time since the last time I wrote this kind of thing. I’m not really sure if you you call this blogging so whatever. I’ll do this anyway, no matter what.
My life for the past 6 months has been through a lot of change and if I start narrating what exactly happened from last year, I think I’ll just cry again and won’t be able to finish this entry for the first day of June. The last few months of my last year was the most memorable or rather tragedic event of my life to the point where I never trusted anyone and I always try to be happy to please everyone though deep inside I’m breaking, turning into peices. I don’t want to write what exactly happened then because I know it would only make them feel guilty. They might think that I’m still mad about what happened and besides they are my friends, after all I still want to do something in return of the good things they’ve done or given to me.
When this year started, I searched for some things that would make me feel better cause I was still very dramatic, frustrated and full of hate. Bitterness lasts for about months but I tried to look for real happiness that does not require a fake smile and pretentious behavior. That was when I got more into music exploration. Ever since I was a child, music has been part of my life. I love listening to some random music with my family influenced me. My personal music genre is Rock, Alternative and Metal Rock. Yeah, just imagine me with everything-black-outfit, heavy eyeliners, long bangs that covers my left eye and my head phones. You can say that I was living on the dark world despite of my relationship with God who gives me hope and all that. You know I just can’t get off easily of that kind of living.
But like I said, everything now has been changed. My black and white life was now painted with neon shades of colors and it was when I turned into a full pledge KPop fanatic. Yes, I am now. If you heard me ranting about how much I hate KPop before well, you better start thinking that I was in karma. But you know, you will never realize how it feels as long as you experience it yourself.
Being a KPop fanatic is just like supporting a local band or singer but the only thing is, you get to support not only their music but also the life of the singers themselves. Ok, I’ll say this straight forward. I support EXO. Supporting them includes loving them, caring for them, and believing them to be successful for the next 10 years.
I was so thankful to be a KPop fanatic or an EXO stan in particular cause I’ve realized what lies beyond this life. I mean, this is where I found my happiness. I became more eager to do my best in everything I will do. I was even motivated this school year so then after I graduate, I’d be able to do everything I want and one of them is to visit the land where it all started, Seoul in South Korea.
To sum it all up, EXO is one of the reason now why am I what I am now besides from my family and of course God.
So, everything has changed but I know this will be for good.
Sometimes, all we need is a space where to put our own drama in life and I just found them here…
Sorry if I wasn’t there beside you. Sorry if I didn’t read your text message cause my stupid freaking phone was dead. Sorry if I wasn’t able to comfort you when you need me. I’m very sorry for I didn’t followed you. I should have known. I should have known that you were broke and in much pain. I should have followed you and help you forget what you felt then. I just don’t feel the guilt for what happened before but I should have been there so you won’t loose me.now. I should been there, I should have been but it’s too late for it has almost been 2 years of regretting what I should have done. I’m so sorry for the late apology but remember that the sympathy I’ve felt before as just the same as I feel now. Please forgive me.
Overwhelming happiness. That would probably beat describe how I feel right now. It was like I’m gonna cry with so much happiness. Breaking Dawn Part 2 was like the most and the best thing ever! I never expected that they could make the best even more the best.
It was years ago when I first find out about Stephenie Meyer’s The Twilight Saga series. I could clearly remember when I read it all in eBook. That was also the time when I figured out that I have an interest in reading novels.
The story itself may be so fiction or cheesy or something but for me, it’s the best thing I’ve ever read. You know as one of the hopeless.romantic in the fairytale land, it really reached my expectation about love and everything.
I could also remember when I was so crazy about Twilight Saga and everything about it like from the casts, music score, directors, author, on how the story was made, to the magazine, books, posters and the merchandise. It was probably the most craziest experience of my life ever.
If only I could turn back time from those time so I would see myself smiling again like a little child who went to a toy store. Now that it’s already the last film of the series, I feel like crying for I will miss it. Like what I felt about the ending of Harry Potter. HU-HU-HU I just wish that I could have the chance to meer the casts of twilight espeacially Kristen Stewart whom I adore so much since she started even before twilight had started.
Hmm. I just can’t keep on smiling on remembering and writing this. Well, I’ll miss Twilight Saga. ( ;-,-)0
It has been months since the last time we talk or see each other and the last time we parted was like the most tormenting feeling EVER! I know I’m exaggerating things but thats just how it is cause for damn sake, I was hurt!
Well, I don’t know why am I this way. I’ve been depressing myself for what happened though I know I shouldn’t be. The first weeks were very dreadful, torturing as I still see the girl, the girl who…. who… the girl who fucking mess up my life. So the bitterness within me lasted for almost a month but as time pass by, I was able to learn how to manage my distress.
Before, he was always on my mind like everything I do I always think of doing it with him. Like eating my favorite chocolate cake, watching our favorite movie and dreaming for the future. Don’t you think it feels nice?
Anyway, so well now I feel more better. I’m finally learning how to live without thinking about him. I had finally learned that some things including people would not last in your life. They might pass by in your life and build friendship with you but not everything will stay. Some have to leave and will definitely cause you pain. That’s human nature, people get hurt when someone so special leave them for good.
But thankfully, I’m learning to accept things in this world. I just have to be patient and strong to continue from learning and conquer life.
Well since that tragedy happened (that’s how I usually call it), I’ve been more observant with what she act or does.
For almost a year, I thought she’s nice and all that- that I’ve put so much of my trust on her but then reality always comes out. It was really ureasonable for her to do that thing to me. Well, I know partly it was my fault but *DamnIt* Didn’t she even think that this would happen? I mean did she even think that I would be hurt? Buwisit na tukso yan! It’s not even a valid reason cause it wouldn’t happen unless she did bite the devil’s trick.
I don’t know if I would be mad to her or to the ‘other’ who is involve cause seriously, am I the only one allowed to feel this way?
But now, look how she does it. I mean she’s been showing off her true colors little by little which gives me souch relief cause I don’t need to tell stories or even convince them what she did to me.
Ok I don’t wanna.remember anything anymore. I’ll probably just shut my mind, my eyes, and my heart.